July (un)done
#1 : a month of (un)learning reviewed
(Un)done is my new monthly round-up. Sharing what I’ve been (un)learning, what’s captured my interest and how that’s shaping my focus for the coming month. It’s free-to-read for all subscribers. 😊
Hey there
I’m writing this at the end of a month that’s been exhausting and exhilarating in equal parts. The excitement and energy for my business has returned and I’m showing up more consistently over here, yet my motivation (or is it my action?) is up and down like a roller-coaster.
This time last year I was getting ready for my summer sabbatical and I had every intention of doing the same again this time around. Something has shifted in me over the past couple of weeks though and I’m considering what I want to do (versus what I think I should do). I’ve enjoyed feeling part of community and I worry that disappearing will put me back to the start. And what exactly is that start? I don’t know. Something else for me to ponder on…
What I’ve been (un)learning this month
How does a quiet person show up in a noisy space?
I’ve been thinking a lot about everything that is going on in the world. The part I want to play. Again with the ‘want’ - is it a want, a need or a must? (I realise that distinction is an irrelevant distraction from the point!)
I want to fight against the horrors we’re seeing. I’m so angry at the fuckeries of our supposed world ‘leaders’. But I know I must continue to take actions in ways that honour my values and personality. And I’ve been figuring out what that means.
I don’t want to - I can’t afford to - stop talking about or promoting my business; that might shout privilege, it might not seem as important, but it’s also a plain truth that what’s important is very subjective and I need my business to work if I’m going to do anything for anyone else. Plus, aforementioned fuckers doing fuckeries certainly don’t let things get in their way of business, so why should I overthink it?!
I don’t want to jump on bandwagons and share images or statements because everyone else is doing it, or, for fear of judgement if I don’t. I don’t want to tell you what to do, what to support or how to respond. I don’t want to be that preachy, shouty, angry person. I get the anger - I feel it too - I also understand why people are unapologetic in the way they’re calling out those who are late to the battle.
Yet, I know that approach can put people off. It shames them. It stops them seeking to engage.
And isn’t that what these leaders want? Us all facing off against each other about who is fighting what, supporting who, shouting the loudest, or for the longest time. If we distract ourselves with in-fighting, then they can carry on doing what they like!
Still, for a moment, I nearly went there. I almost reacted to the movement, not the cause.
Something stopped me. I struggled with it not sitting right. I examined whether my hesitations were valid or not, or was it just another form of privilege at play. I also questioned whether my feelings actually mattered.
Deep down, I know I have to do this my way. Choose my fights. Choose my approach. And constantly question my motivations. What I do may be different to you. It may make you angry. I don’t believe there is a binary choice of right and wrong. There isn’t a hierarchy of causes to support.
The beauty of protest is there are so many shapes, forms and avenues we can take to be heard. There is always something we can do, as Lara Sheldrake shared in her recent post. We need the variety. The quiet. The loud. The disruptive. The compliant. The big gestures. And the small moments. It is the culmination of those that make the impact.
Playing in public is uncomfortable
Doing things differently does get you different results, but, oh boy, stepping out of your comfort zone is a whole vibe that I haven’t really been prepared for.
At the beginning of the month, I shared on my socials the signs that told me I’d fallen out of love with my business. It was the first signal of my pivot and paving the way to do more (un)learning in public.
I feel deeply rooted to the concept of (un)learning. And the conversations I’ve had with others tell me that I’m not alone. But an IRL comment from someone close to me, saying I shouldn’t have posted that, had my confidence run for cover. TBH I couldn’t really engage in a conversation about it - I’m pretty sure their reasons would have come from love and protection for me, and a corporatised view that you don’t wash your dirty linen in public.
But it has led me to second-guessing what I share and why I share it.
Around the same time, in a mini mind I’ve been in with Claire Venus ✨, I decided to properly switch on my paid-subs and use that more protected space for the vulnerable shares, amongst other things. I got in my head about no-one reading these posts because of the paywall. And if no-one read it, then who was I writing for?
There’s obviously a lot wrapped up in these feelings - the value I put on myself and my writing, the patience of building community over time, the fear of rejection.
What’s the point? Why does it matter to me? And, ‘so what’? are questions I continue to carry as I step more fully into this space I’m creating in my life and my business.
I don’t need a rebrand or a new website or new photos
In typical overthink, hyper-focus, go 1000% in on the thing I’m doing, I’ve had to work really hard at redefining what ripping up my business actually means in this moment.
I’ve been working out the positioning, the offers, the experience I want my clients to have. But a bit like when you decorate one part of the house and then realise how grubby the rest of it looks - that’s how I’ve been feeling about the business.
Updating the copy on my website (still a WIP) but thinking the colours and design don’t match my mood anymore.
Writing social posts and hating my canva templates.
Trying to rope friends and family to get more ‘natural’ photos of me because all my official ones feel too aligned with the ‘old’ business.
I know this is procrastination of the highest order. Sure, they’re things I’ll want to tackle in the future. But at the minute, they’re not the things that are gonna make me money. They’re a distraction. Every minute I spend faffing with the website, I’m not writing on here, or connecting with people, or having conversations with potential clients.
D always says I’m looking for ways to spend money and he kind of has a point. My focus now needs to be on bringing in money.
So, I continue to remind myself that I don’t have to have everything perfectly lined up. I can launch an offer without the bells and whistles. And no-one really cares about - or will notice - those other things.
And keeping me occupied this month…
Live music month. I’m ignoring everyone’s posts about Oasis because I have major FOMO and feel personally attacked that I didn’t manage to get tickets. Instead, I’m telling everyone how brilliant Stevie Wonder is after we saw him at BST. Fun fact, D and I walked back down the aisle to a Stevie song, so he has a very special place in our hearts. I was amazed at how brilliant his voice still is (I think this is the third time we’ve seen him and he’s consistently great) at 75 years and how he can bring a crowd together. ‘Love’s in need of love today’ felt very poignant. We also had a weekend glamping at Love Supreme festival; it’s an annual tradition now and a lot of fun even if the weather was pants.



Have you watched the Serena documentary? I didn’t get to watch as much Wimbledon as I’d have liked, but I’ve recently caught this eight-part series about Serena Williams, following her career, interviewing her, her family and her wider team. It’s fascinating. She truly is an amazing athlete, but also comes across as a funny, very honest, person. It’s still on Iplayer (and I think Disney+) if you want to catch it.
It felt like my reading slowed down this month, but looking back I managed to finish five books. I’ve been trying to broaden what I read and experiment with genres - I tend to gravitate towards pacy thrillers and cosy crime novels, with a good dash of Japanese storytelling thrown in. I think changing it up is why I’ve felt it’s going slowly… It took me almost two weeks to finish Helen Garner’s ‘Monkey Grip’ recently and tbh I was underwhelmed - and I felt the same reading Elizabeth Strout’s ‘Olive Kitteridge’ earlier this year - I don’t mind a meandering story, but these books dragged for me and so I wasn’t opting to pick them up and read more. I know both writers are highly recommended over here, so maybe it’s just a poor first choice or perhaps that genre isn’t for me. I’d love your thoughts on this.
One thought I’m taking into next month…
What does a slower summer look like this year without stopping?
I’m taking inspiration from India Knight’s article on ways to make home feel like a holiday for sure. And also plan to resurrect my local tourist adventures. I’m working out how ‘work’ fits into my plans following my pivot. I’m at risk of once again being over-ambitious with my “things to do” list.
Thanks for being here 💕 Let me know how your month has been and what final thoughts you’re taking with you into August. If you’re reading this in your emails then click the link below to share your comments.
All the best … Lee x
🌟 In case you didn’t know… I’m a mindset and NLP coach who works with quietly ambitious founders, change-makers and accidental leaders to (un)learn the BS getting in their way. From walk & talks, to coaching containers and creative strategy sessions using my FLIP method, there are a variety of ways we could work together. If you’re interested in finding out more read this or drop me an email or DM. 🌟








Beautiful bold steps, you're doing brilliantly Lee. x
Honest writing go gal x