This was going to be about biscuits FFS 🤦🏼♀️
the little voice led me astray again!
Hi, I’m Lee and I’m (un)learning in public. I talk about life and business, the BS that holds us back and the things that build us up again (in my case books, creative explorations and a dash of Murder, She Wrote). It’s lovely to have you here 😊
Not everything has to be a massive, thoughtful, well-researched essay.
There’s a lot going on in THE world. In YOUR world. From the disgrace of our politicians who are refusing to use their power for the good of humanity. To the assault course of parenting over the summer holidays.
For me, it’s been going in hard on the business pivot - feeling energised for the first time in forever, but also acutely aware of the signs of being too hyperfocussed and losing sight of the other things that are important to me as well.
There are a lot of actions, words, thoughts, feelings percolating.
The shoulds. The musts. The have tos.
My default in these moments is to overthink to the point of overwhelm. To feel that conflict between done and ‘perfect’, whilst absolutely recognising that neither of these things exist in the way we believe.
I’ve been overthinking what to write this week. I want to keep up my momentum and stay consistent. But with thoughts of growth and building a community, my head was turned towards what ‘content’ might ‘attract’ 🤢.
I mean, I actually started writing a post about the history of the biscuit!
It started as a whimsical reflection of an evening habit, consisting of a cuppa with a couple of bourbons and custard creams to dunk. But then my friend comparison came calling and I thought I could only write this post if I did some in-depth research into how tea and biscuits came to be a thing. Oh, and maybe I should look at the top 10 biscuit brands and see what my strength of feeling was about that (I am still willing to fight anyone who ranks a rich tea!).
An hour later, I had gone down the rabbit hole of all rabbit holes and sat totally deflated staring at my blank screen. I decided to walk away at that point, catching myself turning into the exact thing I wanted to avoid when writing on here.
The inner talk had told me that to be an engaging substacker I had to have well-polished, well-researched, well-argued thought pieces. Yet, the whole point of blowing up my business and leaning into (un)learning was because I didn’t want to do what everyone else was doing.
The biscuit idea resembled the sodden mess in the bottom of the mug when you misjudge your dunk time. It had to go.
Instead, I thought I would write this as a permission slip for you to let go of the thing you’re overthinking.
We all do it.
Only the other week in a coaching session this topic came up. Hundreds of unread emails at work are one thing. But my client was also neglecting her personal messages. Feeling like she had to send long and considered responses to friends and family. Not having the time or headspace meant she had left them. And then guilt had kept her rooted in inaction.
In our session, we explored what message she might have been giving by her silence - and how that sat with her intentions. It was an emotional realisation of the damage she could have been causing to her relationships. And so we looked at what alternative there could be to the long thoughtful response she wanted to give in the ‘perfect’ world. When we next met, the small shift she’d made - sending a holding note with love - had lifted her load in more ways than one.
Short and sweet is ok.
If you’re feeling the same this week, perhaps ask yourself:
What’s the quick action I can take right now?
We can’t do everything, but we can do something. And no, you don’t have to eat the frog first thing! If that one action will make you feel better, then do the bloody thing.
What lies might my inner voice be telling me about this?
Remember, it’s a sticky little bugger! And if you need to mute other people who trigger it for you, then go ahead.
What am I doing just to satisfy what I think others want from me?
If you’re not a food writer, chef or coffee shop owner, please don’t feel you have to resort to writing about biscuits!
Just for fun, let me know in the comments what your biscuit or snack of choice with a cuppa is? And feel free to share any reflections these prompts have thrown up for you.
Lee x
PS. if the weight of the world stuff is leaving you feeling helpless as well have a read of this. There is always something we can do.
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🌟 In case you didn’t know… I’m a mindset and NLP coach who works with quietly ambitious founders, change-makers and accidental leaders to (un)learn the BS getting in their way. From walk & talks, to coaching containers and creative strategy sessions using my FLIP method, there are a variety of ways we could work together. If you’re interested in finding out more read this (or drop me an email or DM. 🌟
Overthink a lot!
I read something recently that suggests the brain works hard to reinforce what you are thinking , seeks out to reinforce your belief.
That has helped me reframe some stuff. I’m starting to overthink so a cup of cha and an empire biscuit for me ( rediscovered now back in Scotland , fatal).
I'm guilty of overthinking that I overthink too much! My go to biccie is the custard cream, but my everyday biscuit of choice is the mighty digestive...and no one can convince me otherwise 🤣 In fact, I think I need one now!